Race For The Cure 2010

This year was a little different for me.  I don't feel like just a regular supporter of the cause anymore, because I have had the bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction.  I have lost my breasts, but I didn't have cancer.  I didn't go through chemo/radiation.  I didn't lose my hair.  I didn't get chemo brain.  I didn't worry that a lump could cause me my life.  I'm not a "survivor".  I had the surgery so I wouldn't have to be a survivor.  I wanted to take control.  I did it for my daughter and for my husband, and for the rest of my family.  I didn't want to have to suddenly put my life on hold in 5 or 10 years when I eventually got breast cancer.  I didn't want to put my body through the surgery AND the chemo (and possible radiation).  In the hereditary cancer community, I'm considered a "previvor". 

It has been 10 months since my prophylactic mastectomy and I feel great.  The recovery was very easy for me.  The intense relief I felt in those first few moments after surgery far outweighed the pain.  I still feel that the surgery was absolutely the right decision for me.  

So, like I said, I'm a previvor. I'm not a survivor, but also not just a regular supporter.  I'm really not sure where I fit at the event this year.  When I went to register and pick up my bib & race t-shirt on Friday, the VERY sweet lady asked me if I was a survivor.  I paused and told her no, but I told her I was a PREVIVOR.  She asked if I was BRCA positive and I told her I was and that I had the mastectomy in January and she handed me the pink race bib. The one meant for survivors to wear (non-survivors wear white bibs).  Then she pointed me around the corner to pick up my shirt. On my way back out, I stopped again to tell her I just didn't feel right about the pink bib since I didn't actually have cancer.  I didn't go through the chemo, but she insisted.  Her name was Stacey and she made me cry.  So, in the end, I wore the pink race bib.

I made shirts for my little family to wear.  They were GREAT and got several comments.  Keith's shirt said, "I *heart* my wife's foobs" on the front and mine said "yes, they're FAKE..." on the front.  The back said "my real ones could have killed me" and it said "I am a Previvor".  Etta's shirt said "My Aunt D is a survivor / My Momma is a previvor".  All three of our shirts fell apart as the morning wore on (Keith's was the WORST).  I made them with iron-on transfers last night and they were a bit of a disaster.  I had messed up a couple shirts earlier in the week with different (but MUCH better) transfer paper.  After messing those up, I had to go back and buy more paper and shirts.  I bought cheaper transfer paper.  Apparently that was a big mistake.  It was CRAP!  The transfer didn't stick to the fabric and flaked off all day today. I actually carried a roll of double-sided tape with us at the walk so I could keep fixing Keith's shirt.   

The weather was perfect today!  We got there about an hour and a half before the walk started and we milled around in the "Race Village" and got a few freebies.  This event is always HUGE, but I think the crowd was a little bigger this year because of the nice weather.  About 15 minutes before the walkers got to start, we met up with Lauren and little Liam and Amy and Susan and a few other "Primrose Pals" for the walk.  The walk took us right past their school which was decorated for the event.  So, we stopped and took a little group photo.

By the time we finished the walk, we were hot and sweaty and stinky and TIRED.  Etta passed out before I was even able to get out of the parking lot!